Ritual

So today, to mark the passage of 2016 into 2017, I attended a Sound Healing and Burning Bowl meditation event at the local Buddhist temple.  It was an interesting experience! I have never been to a Buddhist temple, nor have I participated in a Burning Bowl Fire Puja.  But it seems like a popular event, seeing as I had to wait in line for 15 minutes to get in.  There were at least 200 people in attendance.

Each attendee received a slip of paper upon which they were to write things they wished to leave behind this year.  We were encouraged to write "Anything not serving you."  Really, the paper wasn't big enough for me to down all the things I wanted to burn up from 2016 - but I managed to pare it down to the essentials, which I won't post here because it's all burnt up and GONE!

During the "ceremony", we were invited to chant the following phrase: Om Mani Padme Hun, which means "the jewel in the lotus".  Some guy was playing a large didgeridoo-type thing and a woman was playing rock/singing bowls.  And person was guided to walk to the front of the room and burn their slip of paper.

Since I chose to sit at the back of the room, I was waiting for quite some time to go up and burn my paper.  I was able to let the sounds wash over me and listen to this roomful of people create a peaceful vibration together.  I eventually briefly joined in the chanting, but didn't keep it up for long.  I was thinking about ritual.

Rituals are fascinating.  What is our need to have them in our lives?  They ground us.  They provide clues to our identity.  They link us to people and communities.  And for some, rituals connect them to a higher power.  I didn't feel any of that in the ritual I participated in today.  For me, it was a powerful thing to watch my failings burn away, but it was very personal and didn't have anything to do with anyone else in the room.

I was wondering if there were any rituals that I had.  Honestly, I can't think of any...morning coffee??  And to what does that connect me?  So maybe I should incorporate some rituals into my life.  I'd hate them to be empty, though - but I also don't want to create some phony ritual that I pretend means something when it doesn't.  How does one find a ritual that speaks to them and that gives purpose and meaning and cohesion in ones life?  I don't know, but I'd like to take a journey to find out.

p.s. - See ya later 2016, don't let the door hit ya in the ass on the way out.

Under the Banner of Heaven

I just finished reading the phenomenal book entitled Under the Banner of Heaven, by John Krakauer, about Mormon Fundamentalism centered around the 1984 murder of Brenda and Erica Lafferty at the hands of her brothers-in-law.

I have always been intrigued/baffled by Mormonism/Latter-Day Saints (LDS), since falling in love with one in 2003 at the tender age of 18.  He was my first boyfriend and my first love.  I was head-over-heels and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.  Unfortunately, our respective religious views (I was still a practicing JW at the time), weren't compatible.  I faced huge pressure from my parents to avoid him at all costs - JWs are strongly encouraged to only date and marry other JWs.  And I knew he was preparing to go on a mission trip.  Still, I firmly believed we could make things work - and to that end we both agreed to study each other's religion.

I was sure that he would eventually "see the light" after studying with the JWs...but that never happened.  I'm assuming he felt the same about me, but I obviously never converted to Mormonism.  He left on his mission trip to the Philippines in December 2004, my heart broke, and that was that.  We kept in touch for a bit, but we both eventually moved on.  He's now married (to a Mormon) with a young daughter. 

Although the values systems of Mormonism and JWs are somewhat similar - emphasis on the family, reading Scriptures together, chastity, modesty, the command to preach the truth to the rest of the world, blah blah blah - the doctrine is quite different. QUITE DIFFERENT! 

I distinctly recall talking to my LDS boyfriend after finding out that Mormons believed that ancient Israelites had rowed across the Atlantic Ocean in leather boats to discover America, and that Jesus had visited believers on this new continent.  I was baffled - people believed this?! My boyfriend confirmed that, yes, he believes this.  And then the more I read, the wider my eyes grew: temple rituals, baptism of the dead, secret handshakes, men can eventually become gods, the necessity of having numerous children in order to provide vessels for spirits to come to earth, special underwear.  This stuff was super bizarre to me! 

Once it became clear that there was no way in hell I would convert to Mormonism, I left off researching it.  Over the years, references to Mormonism would make me bristle a bit - I was still nursing my broken heart - but mostly I would just shake my head at the inanity of it all.  I left my own religion a few years later, after taking a Judaism class at University and appreciating the banter and relationship that Jews had with God.  As of now, I would characterize my spirituality as non-existent and apathetic.

Recently, via a group WhatsApp chat with my 4 best friends, we started talking about Mormonism after we noticed that many pretentious lifestyle blogs and instagram accounts were run by Mormons.  (For a hilarious parody site, check out Seriously So Blessed.)  One friend mentioned her own in-depth study of Mormonism, and referenced a history of violence and racism in Mormonism that I had not heard before. She suggested I read Krakauer's book, and, the last time I saw her, she had brought me a copy to borrow.

This has been one of the most fascinating books I may have ever read!  And also eye-opening about, as my friend mentioned, the history of violence and racism from the beginnings of Mormonism through to at least the 1970s when the LDS church finally allowed black people to join the priesthood and participate more fully in the religion.

The book chronicles the history of Mormonism since its inception in 1829 when The Book of Mormon was published, through the colonization by Mormons of the Midwestern United States, the defiance towards government by church leaders, and then various sects that branched off mostly in relation to the church's eventual outlawing of polygamy/plural marriage.  All this is told within the context of the 1984 murders of Brenda Lafferty and her baby daughter, Erica.

Although the book contains helpful maps, it would have been beneficial to have had some kind of family tree chart.  It seems everyone is interconnected in some way through varying marriages and step-relations.  To be fair, though, figuring out the family tree becomes a daunting task when a father takes his own step-daughter as a new wife, effectively making the step-daughter a step-mother to her own mother...mind-boggling!

This kind of incest and pedophilia is rampant throughout fundamentalist Mormon communities, and is extremely disheartening.  Families there continue to practice plural marriages, with girls as young as 12 years old being married off to much older men.  These communities are run almost exclusively by Mormons, who control everything from government to banking to policing.  Escape is difficult.

I highly recommend this book!!