I'm currently at the CONTACT Training program in Brattleboro, Vermont. CONTACT stands for Conflict Transformation Across Cultures. The program is held at the SIT Graduate Institute, a branch of World Learning. This is the first year that the program is offering a joint training by Musicians Without Borders, which is the main reason I've enrolled.
The MWB portion of the session is not until next week. This week I'm learning about non-violent conflict resolution through amazing teachers such as Tatsushi Arai, Bruce Dayton, Susie Belleci, and Mehlaqa Samdani. Future lecturers include playwright Court Dorsey, Hon. Patricia Whalen (former Judge, War Crimes Chamber of Bosnia Herzegovina), Vahidin Omanovic, and the trainers from MWB.
Today was all about IDENTITY. This portion affected me quite deeply, as we examined the ways in which we see ourselves, and the ways in which society sees us. But more than that, I kept coming back to a question a colleague asked some months back, which was - "What is the big deal with identity? Why is everyone talking about identity?!" This was really a question in response to the transgender bathroom issue, that people who are trans should be able to use the bathroom associated with the gender by which they identify.
And so today I kept coming back to that question from her - why is everyone talking about identity?
Here's why:
Identity helps situate ourselves in the world. It gives us a reference point to not only walk through life, but also to survive, as we may need to find the groups where we feel safe and protected.
Identity gives us a way to be known - and we all want to be known. We all have stories that we want to share about who we are and why we are that person. A strong sense of identity allows us to know ourselves and where/how we belong on this planet.
Identity is a source of conflict - when what we feel within is not the way we are perceived by others. Or what we feel within is not seen on the outside. Who we think we are may not be how or who others think we are. So then we have a personal identity, and a social identity. These two essences may not connect.
When aspects of our identity are attacked, it influences our behavior. That aspect of our identity might shut down. Or it might consume us.
**
My colleague who asked the earlier question is a white middle-aged woman. She has mentioned that she identifies strongly as a woman.
So, in terms of a bathroom, she would use the one assigned to women. It is where she feels comfortable. It is where she feels she belongs. It resonates with her because it aligns with her identity.
This is exactly the same way that trans people feel about using the bathroom corresponding to their gender. They want to use the space in which they feel safe. In which they feel comfortable. In which they feel as though they belong. The place that aligns with their identity.
Finding these aspects of identity that we share can go a long way towards understanding the points of view of another person who we consider to be very different from us.
The MWB portion of the session is not until next week. This week I'm learning about non-violent conflict resolution through amazing teachers such as Tatsushi Arai, Bruce Dayton, Susie Belleci, and Mehlaqa Samdani. Future lecturers include playwright Court Dorsey, Hon. Patricia Whalen (former Judge, War Crimes Chamber of Bosnia Herzegovina), Vahidin Omanovic, and the trainers from MWB.
Today was all about IDENTITY. This portion affected me quite deeply, as we examined the ways in which we see ourselves, and the ways in which society sees us. But more than that, I kept coming back to a question a colleague asked some months back, which was - "What is the big deal with identity? Why is everyone talking about identity?!" This was really a question in response to the transgender bathroom issue, that people who are trans should be able to use the bathroom associated with the gender by which they identify.
And so today I kept coming back to that question from her - why is everyone talking about identity?
Here's why:
Identity helps situate ourselves in the world. It gives us a reference point to not only walk through life, but also to survive, as we may need to find the groups where we feel safe and protected.
Identity gives us a way to be known - and we all want to be known. We all have stories that we want to share about who we are and why we are that person. A strong sense of identity allows us to know ourselves and where/how we belong on this planet.
Identity is a source of conflict - when what we feel within is not the way we are perceived by others. Or what we feel within is not seen on the outside. Who we think we are may not be how or who others think we are. So then we have a personal identity, and a social identity. These two essences may not connect.
When aspects of our identity are attacked, it influences our behavior. That aspect of our identity might shut down. Or it might consume us.
**
My colleague who asked the earlier question is a white middle-aged woman. She has mentioned that she identifies strongly as a woman.
So, in terms of a bathroom, she would use the one assigned to women. It is where she feels comfortable. It is where she feels she belongs. It resonates with her because it aligns with her identity.
This is exactly the same way that trans people feel about using the bathroom corresponding to their gender. They want to use the space in which they feel safe. In which they feel comfortable. In which they feel as though they belong. The place that aligns with their identity.
Finding these aspects of identity that we share can go a long way towards understanding the points of view of another person who we consider to be very different from us.
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